UNTIL LOVE FINDS YOU | PRIORITISE YOUR PURPOSE
If you read my Val's Eve Letter to Margaret, you would’ve noticed that I started talking about purpose.
If you haven’t read it, go back here and read, before you continue.
Remember in my
introduction to the Until Love Finds You series, I explained that women are
super important in God’s plan for creation and without us, very few men can
achieve their purpose on earth? It is
important that you know where you are going.
A story. When I moved to England for school, it was my first time. I did not know anywhere. I’d get on the bus, knowing in my head that I’m headed for Chancery Lane (it’s in London, okay?) I had never seen the place and I did not know it. I was also not used to the bus system and was always anxious.
So I kept alighting and getting lost. Then I’d cross the road, hop on another bus which was going in the opposite direction, hop off at the wrong stop and the cycle will continue for 40 minutes until I was exhausted and nearly in tears. Eventually, my ego will give way and I’d approach a stranger and ask for help. I laugh at my silliness now. But this is the situation most of us are in.
First, we do not know where we are going (our destination/purpose), so everywhere looks like it! We keep getting off, changing buses (careers, friends, courses in school, relationships, mentors). Sometimes we cross over to the wrong side of the road (completely terrible choices) then we get aboard the wrong bus (wrong company, wrong relationships).
Next, we get confused like I did, we feel exhausted and mad at the transportation
system (God, or our lives), or mad at ourselves for not being able to read a simple map. Eventually,
our ego may give way and we go seek help! Some of us may just return home (dying without getting to our destination), but I pray none of you readers end up this way. In Jesus' name, amen!
When you don’t know
your destination, everywhere will look like it. When you don’t know who you are
supposed to go with on the journey (relationship, husband) every man may look like
the one. My hope is that you reach the point of exhaustion quickly enough to
seek help, or just advise yourself to seek help before the journey begins.
How and from whom do we
seek help? As usual, God first. And don’t trivialise this. Is He the one who
created you? Yes. Do you think He was absent-minded while creating you? I
doubt. So will He have a plan for your life here? Definitely Yes! Would you
want to know and try hard to fulfil it? You’d be silly to say no.
A woman is the only other
entity in the Bible that has the same description as the Holy Spirit. We are
both Helpers. You can add Comforter too. Because the way I see it, women tend
to be softer and have the ability to comfort and bring healing to hurting
hearts.
Men were not described this way and that is what makes us so important as women. Dear girl, do not be puffed up by this knowledge for with great power comes great responsibility.
Let me tell you about
my faucet. My kitchen faucet was broken for 2 weeks. I was too lazy to call the
plumber to fix it. This means I could not do my dishes with water from my tap. You
can judge me for the extent of my laziness because even I surprised myself (LOL).
For 2 weeks, I was fetching water with a basin, from my bathroom sink, to do my
dishes. Yes. Let us be disappointed in me. There were days I’d get so annoyed
and slap the faucet for not working. As if I did not know who had to solve the
problem.
The lesson here is
this. That broken faucet was no longer fulfilling its purpose. That meant that
my life was made significantly harder as it took a longer time to get the
dishes done.
This is what happens
when you are not prioritising your purpose. There are people God has ordained
to benefit from you fulfilling your purpose and when you haven’t discovered it,
or you have discovered it but are not walking in it, others suffer.
Your life is a solution
to someone’s problem. Until you are fully walking in your purpose, both you and
that person(s) will be unhappy.
The only way to live a
truly fulfilling life is when you are walking in your purpose. When you are not prioritising your purpose, you have enough time on your hands and that is when you begin to chase men instead of patiently letting love come to you.
Some of you have
discovered it already and I am happy for you. But, are you prioritising it? Or are
you waiting for a man to come into your life first? No! don’t do that. No man
will help you discover your purpose. Remember that God had established Eve’s
purpose already when he took out Adam’s rib. Your duty, darling girl, is to keep
going to your Father in heaven until you get clarity.
Men have a hard time discovering
their own purpose, let alone help you with yours. Who is called the Helper
here? You. So, you need to have yourself figured out first, before you go join
yourself to any man.
Many women have gotten married when they had not figured out their purpose. Do you know how they feel now? Lost. Sad. Lonely. Unworthy and full of regret. They wonder if all they came to do in life was to raise some man’s kids, clean the house, have sex in the night or day depending on your preference, and take care of the man.
Guess what, all the above is in our
job description as women. That is all part of being a helpmate so there is
nothing wrong with doing that. But it becomes a chore when we have not
figured out our individual purpose.
These women begin to despise their role, their husbands and sometimes even their kids. But the only person they should be holding accountable is themselves. I understand, they may not have had anyone telling them this. But I believe it is never too late.
I know a
wonderful woman who had to go through a divorce and rediscover herself. She built her
business and currently earns 7 figures. Love found her again and she re-married at
50. The way I see it, she is enjoying her life and living her purpose of
empowering other young ladies to discover themselves. Her content is godly and filled with sound advice. And I encourage you to check her out on Instagram here or Youtube here. She talks about why you may not be happy in your relationship and why you are probably still single. Thank me later!
For those of you who haven’t yet found your purpose, keep going. Are you truly praying about it or you just mumble a few words and walk away. Take it seriously. Spend an hour each night or day asking God to help you. Tell Him to order your steps to the right places and bring the right people your way.
I begun praying for my purpose as early as 8 years old. And by 12, I knew I had to be a writer, but I did not respect the calling. Nonetheless, I was taking courses in writing. I paid up for a writing class by myself at 15 years, right after Junior High School. Even now, I read everything I can find on the internet about writing.
It was not until last
year that I finally accepted it. Then everything begun to fall in place for me.
I feel fulfilled when I am writing. My mind is always active, thinking of what
to do next, how best to improve my skill. Sometimes, I wake from sleep in the
middle of the night, to scribble ideas. Your purpose will keep you busy. You will
be passionate about it and that is what will draw your right man to you. It will
draw other bad men to you too, however, so be careful.
Do you have a talent? Begin
from there. Imagine yourself as a father or mother. Your 12 year old child is
going to school and you give them money. Do you think you are giving it to them
just because, or you expect them to use it. Do you expect them to return the
money to you untouched? You will be alarmed, especially if you packed no snacks
or lunch for them. So you expected them to use that money!
It is the same with
God. When He was sending you on earth, he gave you talents. He will be
disappointed if you return to heaven with your talents untouched or
unexploited. So stop despising your talent. Yes, you may not be a star singer,
an award-winning dancer, a mighty preacher or any of those ‘recognised’ gifts.
But you have something.
You can write, you can sing well enough, take nice pictures, edit videos, encourage
people with your words, provide help to people that makes their lives easy,
paint, draw, create things out of a mess. You can teach, nurture plants,
decorate a space, make clothes, design concepts, tell stories, bring life to dying
things. There is something in you and you know it. The world wouldn’t know it
and until you stop despising it, you cannot find and walk in your purpose.
Today, if I may indulge you, promise yourself to start focusing on that thing you know deep down is your talent. Promise yourself that you will stop looking down on it. When you finally accept that gift, God will begin to inspire you on how to use it.
Remember, He gave it to you and He has a truckload of ideas on how to use it. Talk to
Him.
You are beautiful. You are loved and you are worth it.💗
Yours truly
Very Precious
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